Signaling Changes

Original

Revised

I made the change to the beginning of this sentence because without the point that it is my idea, the reader would assume it was Gee’s idea. This makes sense because i put my idea right after a quote and did not try to distinguish them both.

Original

Revised

 

Right after i explain an idea from Cuddy i follow it up with an idea that i have. Without signalling the reader would just assume that it is apart of the same paper. Especially since it goes off her idea, i have to identify who believes what.

Original

Revised

In this revision i first connected Gee’s idea directly to the sentence, then i put in my idea right after so that the reader can figure out who’s opinion is who’s. This is important because without the distinguished ideas from each contributor to the paper, it is just one big summery.

 

collreadwrit1a